A Special Guest

This year, just as the climate convention class of 2020 was winding down, a guest who has always been invited but who had never attended before, paid a surprise visit. 

The doors to the convention center opened with a gust of windblown snow. The attendees lively chatter abruptly ceased.  They turned to the entrances to witness green, blue, and pink waves of color enter the building in waves of undulating florescent curtains. The northern lights had arrived and lit the hall.

Along the floor ran a silver white fluffy arctic fox who leapt onto the stage as flocks of the northern birds, chatty chickadees, flitted by chattering a greeting. White silent fliers, the arctic owls soared inches above the guest’s heads.

Dumbfounded and a bit startled the audience turned its attention to the doors in apprehension of what might appear next. A Lady and a gentleman strode in. He appeared to be dressed in a simple lab coat. She, on the other hand, wore a brilliant white mink overcoat reaching to the floor. She was radiant, her dark hair flowing down her back with what appeared to be bright stars plucked from the evening sky embedded in her curls. In her arm nestled a young Koala.

The crowd, at first dumbfounded, started to murmur to one another. This must be the guest who never attends! Is this Mother Nature dressed in winter apparel accompanied by her entourage of animals? The man, no one recognized.  But his confident presence would later be referred to as Newtonian.

The master of ceremonies recovered his composure as the pair joined him center stage, “Mother Nature it is an honor you have graced us with your presence!”

Before she could speak, a young attendee taking exception to her lavish fur coat blurted out, “But Mother Nature, how could you wear a coat of so many of your little creatures’ skins?”  The crowd now alerted to the unpleasant dilemma became uneasy.  

At this, Mother Nature beamed a smile to the young woman, raised her arms, and said, “My little friends, it is time for you to meet these fine ladies and gentlemen.” What had appeared as white fur skins now sprang to life. With eyes wide open, the mink turned their heads to the onlookers. Simultaneously, they pulled out their black tip tails and waved them in unison in what would be analogous today to the wave. The tips wound around her one way, and then the other. Their black tipped tails undulated as Mother Nature made a graceful pirouette.  

This spectacle put everyone at ease. Mother Nature, it was apparent, had a sense of humor! They responded with laughter and applause.

As the applause died and the wave subsided the master of ceremonies asked Mother Nature the obvious question, “Mother Nature to what do we attribute this honor? We are gratified you have joined us. Is there a message you wish to leave us?

“Yes, I am pleased to be here, and I do have a message. These hurricanes and wildfires have been dreadful.  People believe I have deliberately set these disasters upon mankind in anger. This saddens me because they are not of my making. I wish to offer an explanation. Since I am not a scientist, I brought a dear friend to explain what is happening.  Dr Fizz Icks , when he heard of my troubling situation, generously agreed  to explain why storms and wildfires are getting bigger.  Dr Icks is a philosopher of nature, a lover of nature, and a defender of truth.  Modern folks know him as a scientist.”

At that Dr Fizz Icks stepped forward and addressed the crowd. “Thank you, Mother Nature. It is a privilege to address these fine people. As a scientist my job, like any scientist, is to discover truth. Men and women scientists take pride in this pursuit. The universe, whether created six thousand years ago or six billion years ago, is governed by law. The law is referred to as the Laws of Nature and these have been here and constant since creation. We scientists simply strive to discover how the law works.

Mother Nature is committed to you, and to her creatures, and to life.  Unfortunately, she is like all of us, subject to the law.  

The increase in major storms and wildfires is caused by a complex chain of events. I will simplify them a bit while retaining the basic truth. For every action there is a reaction. With every event there is a cause.  One species on earth, our ancestors, discovered we can extract energy from coal, oil, and gas. This discovery has made life much more comfortable for us homo sapiens.  Unfortunately, an unanticipated side effect of burning fossil fuels has set itself upon earth.  This externality, the result of burning fossil fuels, is the production of greenhouse gasses. As they spread through the atmosphere, these gasses trap heat from the sun which raises the temperature of the earth’s water, land, and air.

Heat always moves to cold. The movement of heat is what creates earth’s weather. As we heat the earth rapidly, it intensifies this movement adding energy to storms.

In the case of forests, when they warm too much without additional rain, they dry making them vulnerable to fire.

Luckily, since man is blessed with a large brain, a thumb, and a conscience, he is capable of finding ways to power his civilizations without pushing these gasses into the air. By continuing to learn more about the laws that govern energy, scientists have and will continue to find clean ways to power man’s lifestyles.

Thank you for letting me explain to you what is happening and why we should support our scientists, engineers, and entrepreneurs who work hard to bring us clean energy.  As I finish, let me assure you Mother Nature is not responsible for extreme weather events.”

“Thank you, Dr Fizz Icks, it is a comfort to know Mother Nature bears us no harm.  It is also comforting to know we have the ability to make our future better.” Said the master of ceremonies beaming with satisfaction.

Turning to Mother Nature, the master of ceremonies asked, “I know the hour is late, but I must ask you one more thing. Why do you carry a Koala? We never see Australian marsupials in our neck of the woods.”

“Yes, isn’t she cute? This is Kaitie. As you know California was not the only place hot, dry, and burning. Australia had its worst fire season ever. Nearly half a billion of my animals died there.  Of those, thousands of Koalas perished.” Tears formed in her eyes. “Australia has lost 34 species to extinction and the earth may lose one million more of my lovely creatures. Since I do not have supernatural powers, I cannot change this course of destruction.  Only mankind can.

As you can imagine the emotion, the need to desperately do something, was overwhelming. I made the exception and nursed poor Kaitie back to health. Once every hundred years or so I get to sneak in a little intervention. I think the last time I did this was when I gave a flock of sea gulls a tip there was a tasty horde of locusts just over the ridge in the Salt Lake Valley.

If I could save the earth from hurricanes and wildfire, I would, but this is solely man’s responsibility.

Now, we must go. I know it is late and I thank you for patiently listening to me and Dr Fizz Icks.”

“If you must go, where do you live so we can find you?”, asked the MC.

“Live?” she smiled. “Dr Fizz Icks and I are not physical beings. Mothers exist, of course, and so does nature.  Mother Nature and science only exist in the minds of human beings. That is why I am here. You see, as long as people love nature, love truth, and love one another Mother Nature will be the beautiful lady of your imagination. If you genuinely love something, you will care for it.”

At that the Aurora Borealis lit the room, the birds launched from their perches. The fox leapt and ran for the exit. Mother Nature and Dr Fizz Icks waved and headed to the doors. As they walked all eyes turned to watch. As Mother Nature passed the attendees, the mischievous weasels were up to their old tricks. Their black tipped tails were busy spelling something. Quickly the crowd deciphered their message.                       “Mother-Nature-Bats-Last”.

Epilogue: A few of the local kids ran to watch them leave. Some of them said they jumped into a sleigh carved from ice and sped off. Other said it was a brilliant white sleigh made of birch bark constructed in a fashion reminiscent of Anishinaabe canoe craftsmen.

 The animals pulling the sleigh where, according to most, white caribou with massive antlers. But others disagreed. Animals that large and powerful, they claimed, must have been albino moose.

 But all agreed on one issue, they were headed straight towards the North Star.

Some postulated they went to join the scientists on the Polarstern locked in the Arctic Ocean. Some say they must have gone to the land of the Ice Bear to visit Old Man Winter in his last refuge.

 Personally, I like to think Mother Nature simply talked the hard-working Dr Icks into taking a few days off. In the North, it is rumored, she teaches her favorite friends how to surf the waves of northern lights.